Wednesday, April 1, 2009

An April Fool's to Remember

Race back to the early 90s, either 1991 or 1992. After we got married, we had our share of issues with the Immigration & Naturalization Service...

The INS almost wouldn't let Mike into the country in January '90 because he didn't have a "fiancee visa," even though if he had one, he wouldn't have been able to stay until our wedding in June '90. They detained him in Minneapolis and grilled him, my mom, and me (via the telephone); searched through all of his belongings; and nearly had me in hysterics because after a 4-month separation, I thought he was going to be sent back to England!

We had bought tickets to go to Spain and Portugal for our honeymoon, without realizing that Mike wouldn't be able to leave the country until he got his green card. So we forfeited our tickets (no refunds), and we have yet to get to Spain and Portugal!

When we were returning from the UK after Mike's dad died suddenly, Mike was pulled away to the holding pen where they searched South Africans and Iranians, without any explanation to him or me. Each time we asked, they would bark at us. Finally, he was interrogated...and we discovered that there was someone with his exact name running around Buffalo, New York, with someone named Leslie Dean...doing god-knows-what. (We were guessing IRA terrorism?) After finally determining that he was not the man in question, the INS informed him that he might have to go through this again. (Think that was why he said we should hyphenate our names???)

So I wouldn't say we have had a rosy relationship with the INS (although now that Mike's a citizen, things are much easier). At any rate, on that early 90s April Fool's Day, Mike received a phone call from someone at the INS, who announced they would be paying a surprise visit to our apartment that evening. He called me at work in a panic, and we spent about an hour fretting about the upcoming INS visit. Until my mom called to let us know that it was all a ruse. She had put her colleague up to it--he had called and pretended to be the INS agent. (Need I mention that she worked in a PSYCHIATRIC WARD?? Obviously they were all crazy there! Just kidding, Mom!)

I could not believe that my dear, sweet mother would play such an awful trick on the unsuspecting, young married couple. Every year, I have thought about how I could get even with her.

Today I came up with a perfect plot: I could call her up and let her know: "I have some bad news, and some good news."

The bad news is...the vasectomy failed!

The good news is...(at this point I was going to say "you're going to have another grandchild") when Kieran heard me telling Mike this story, he filled in with "It's April Fool's Day!"

But I just cannot bring myself to do it. It's too mean. Mike suggested that we could call them up and say that their house had been broken into (they're still in Canada)...

Even meaner.

I guess I'm just not meant for this April Fool's stuff. Plus I'm a terrible liar. So I have to resort to telling this story about my mom's wily ways...she's a sneaky one! :)

1 comment:

  1. I do remember when that happened. No, I wasn't the one that made the call. I am Polly Perfect, and only heard about it after Shirley accomplished the deed. But I do remember she felt horrid about it.

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